Lynjbennett65
"Some from my other support groups will know that my mom passed away January 22, 2025 of complications from a rare blood cancer. Today is a rough day. Mom always made such a fuss over Valentines Day. My dad has said he knows he must learn to live without mom and as such he's made plans for the near future. Camping, traveling, he's taking a college course... but of course we're all still in mourning and it's driving my symptoms through the roof. Storm after storm both literally and figuratively. I think my body is literally mourning because I've internalized so much of my pain. I always internalize my pain. I have internalized things since I was like 4 years old. I do know that it will make me more symptomatic... even when I was a kid I'd get more stomach aches or feel exhausted even when I slept a full night. It's the same now. When mom began to deteriorate rapidly I knew my body would feel the pain more than my heart. I think it's a protective measure. I'll speak to my counselor on the 20th, maybe we can get this sorted so that I don't get stuck in the grieving process. I don't want my dad to get stuck either. I just keep thinking what would mom want me to do. I decided that part of the process would be to talk about my mom's death publicly because that way I am expressing my distress actively. "
, that's so generous and would be so welcome! And it would be like sharing your mom and her love with others <3
It is so cold here, too. I couldn't sleep last night because of pain in my leg. I empathize. I hope it eases up soon. (((hugs))). (Warmly, Donna (Team Member)
Today is one of those bitter cold days that makes my symptoms nuts but of course I do have my box of yarn 😀 I've decided to make some sweater squares so I can create fidget cardigans when needed 😀 or when I get enough squares saved up 😀 I might not be able to make things for my mom but I know she'd want me to share the wealth. 😀 , the memories that come softly are the ones I treasure most. The sweater sounds amazing, and I know a great many people who could benefit from something like that. I love how you incorporated the fidget bits into something fashionable that maintained her dignity. Thank you for sharing that.
Some of my favorite memories of my dad, the ones that make me smile and giggle a little, are the ones born out of his fussiness 😀 So you used the contents of that box to keep her warm, and those memories keep you warm. Pretty special box <3 - Warmly, Donna (Team Member)Thank you. I was digging through a huge box of yarn in my room looking for a big cone of cotton yarn when I suddenly thought about mom. So many of the things I made went to her to keep her warm. I even designed cardigan that had beads for "fidgeting" placed through out the sweater so that in her dementia she'd have this to keep her warm, in style, and calm). My mom was particular about things and I have to say she and I are so opposite. I don't have the energy to fuss over things anymore, but I do miss the occasional comments she's make about fading curtains or needing to get her hair done again because the hairdresser didn't get it right. (no hair dresser would have, ever) She always looked amazing despite feeling like the hairdresser didn't get it quite right. 😀 I do miss her but I know I've got my dad to focus on. , sending (((hugs))), love and light. I'm so sorry for your loss. I think it's important that you talk about your mom. How you feel losing her, and it's okay to remember little funny things that come up that you may have forgotten. That helps with the process, and sharing it may help others as well. We're here anytime you need a friendly ear. - Warmly, Donna (Team Member)